A Womens Month Feature: Choc Mami speaks on Womens Month

Now it’s Choc Mami’s turn to answer about how she feels about Women’s Month:

How does it feel being an independent woman doing your own thing in 2012?

It actually feels good being able to do my own thing. I have had a lot of diversions in my life and I never dreamed I would be where I am right now. I feel like this is my season and everything I’m doing is already in my book of life. So I have no choice but to keep on achieving greater things and remaining independent. 

What motivates you to help others?

My motivation is I was told I was too old to do adult radio entertainment and no one believed in me let alone helped open any doors for me. So I created my own lane and ran with it. I started everything after the age of 40. I feel like I am the role model for women wanting to pursue their dreams late in life. I go extra hard because people have put up an age barrier and it makes it harder for women my age to be taken seriously. And I love when women tell me how proud they are of me and they wish they had the courage to follow their own heart. So as long as God give me life I will continue to be motivation and inspiration to all of the women over the age of 40. 

March is Women's month. How does that make you feel being honored?

I feel like anytime a woman is honored it’s an accomplishment. I feel we should be honored every damn day. We do so much in life and a lot of it goes unnoticed. Behind every man and behind the scenes is a good woman holding everything down. We are a vital part of everything going on in the world. Life started through us and that’s a very strong statement right there. Women hold so many families and businesses together. I feel everyday our worth increases. It’s just taking people a while for it to register. 

Do you feel that it’s harder for a woman to prove herself in the business world?

It’s very hard for a woman to prove herself because we are living in a male dominated world. Men have called the shots for so long until they feel that we will never be their equal. I think that’s why I go so hard when it comes to my rights and enlightening women. We have to the power to do so much in life. We just need to open our eyes and take every good opportunity and manipulate that bad ones to our advantage!

As women we get this a lot, men feeling the need to test you with sexual advances to get certain doors opened.
How do you deal with that type of negativity?

I deal with that kind of fuckery a lot. And me being the type of person I am, I let a man know real quick that dick isn’t a motivating factor in my life. Everything thing I have accomplished, I have done it with relying on my brain power and the fact that I have good communication skills and being smart as hell. I pride myself on waking up and looking in the mirror and loving what I see. I can’t allow a man to be able to pull strings or call shots because I fucked him to get ahead. Because once you fuck once, you will have to keep on doing it for those doors to stay open. I will continue to struggle until I have paid my dues and God blesses me abundantly. Men approach me all the time with business opportunities and then when they throw dick into the equation and that's when I tell them to miss me with that bullshit. 

What words of advice do you have for other women wanting to start their own business or doing their hearts desire?

I would say do your research and make sure it’s a good fit. Make sure you have the time to invest in yourself to productive and effective. Come up with a way to be original and stand out from the rest of the people doing what you are doing. Always create your own lane and make people drive to it how you want them to. 

Do you consider yourself a role model and why?

Yes I do. The reason is because I’m not afraid to open my life up and share my past demons and present joys with women from all walks of life. I feel that I'm a role model because I’m a survivor of molestation and rape and I over came it to have a healthy sexual relationship. I learned how to channel all the negativity that happened in my life and find a happy medium. I spoke openly and freely about my sexuality to help other women to gain sexual confidence. I want to be a mouth piece for all women that have been victimized so that they can reach deep within themselves to have healthy relationships and sexual relations. I love the fact that I have been allowed the opportunity to give open and honest opinions about sex. You should never be afraid to express yourself sexually or in any other manner for fear of what people will think. No one can judge you nor does anyone know what you have been through. Once a person have walked in my shoes and endured all the hell and pain I have been through then they might be able to say a little something. But even then I still wouldn’t care. As long as God gives me breath and the outlet to speak up on being sexually open and advising women how to please themselves along with their mate, then I will continue to be a role model for every woman that wants to bring her inner freak out. So let's all be freaks together.

What advice would you give other women?

Don’t ever let anyone undermine your self worth; you have been someone ever since you were conceived. Remember that you were created to be beautiful inside and out. Always hold your head up and never let anyone still your joy. This is for all of my sisters that have been victims of abuse whether it was sexual or domestic. Let go and let God. You're a survivor for a reason and you can do anything you set your mind too. Trust me because I am a survivor of all the above and I took my life back and I’m stronger than ever. I f I could do it, so can you. I love you and happy women's month. We deserved this special month!

---